Crud.

Ugh.  Depressing week or so.  Work was truly full on until the end of November.  I was working evenings, weekends, and quite a bit of time when my mom and dad were visiting for Thanksgiving.  I started getting sick the day after Thanksgiving and have had the Crud for the last 2+ weeks.  I blame burning the candle at both ends, although there have been lots of people who have been getting sick.  Fortunately everyone else that was here at Thanksgiving seems to have escaped unscathed.

I've never called for death to come and take me, it has never been really bad, but it's been a domino effect of gross and it's been taking forever to get over.  Swollen throat.  Fever.  Upper respiratory yuck.  Pink eye (pink eye??? with a cold?).  Chapped nostrils.  A second round of pink eye.  Rib muscle pain.  Fatigue.  I've been sent home from work at least once because I sounded so froggy.

As a result of all this I have been missing some delightful parties in the last couple of weeks.    I missed Glitter.  I missed the champagne-tasting party in the Marina.  I did make it to Carl's birthday outing at Blackbird on Friday but my drink didn't taste right, and I was totally wiped out the next day.

This is not a fun way to spend the holiday period.

I was hoping I could spend the rest of this year getting caught up at work from all the other things I've had to put on the back burner, but now there's a fresh new crisis and I had to work on Friday instead of going out Christmas shopping.  I am just realizing, too, that it's too late to make that card I had in mind.

We don't have any decorations up at home (we usually travel at Christmas), and Kent has been in Germany since last Sunday, so basically I've been slobbing around the house surrounded by Kleenex and feeling grumpy.

What I should probably do is break out my little 2' tree and some lights.  That would add some cheer to the place.  I should probably also make sure I'm getting enough sleep this week.  It would be a real bummer to miss out on the Gingerbread party next weekend, or for other holiday get-togethers with friends. 

Sigh - I should go see what else I can get done before going to bed early.  Hopefully the physical crud will go away, as well as the mental crud.  Bleh.  It's no fun being such a crankypants.

six weeks of stuff

OK, I knew I was being inconsistent in blogging.  But more than 6 weeks dark?  Shameful!  There's been a lot going on, mostly work, and that's going to get worse before it gets better.  I've usually been spent by the weekend, so aside from events where we have already agreed to go, I haven't been doing all that much.
One of the things we did was go to Sabrina's wedding up in Calistoga.  The location, event, and key players were all beautiful.  It's funny that I've been finding weddings more interesting since I started planning one.  Oh, it's not that I didn't care for them, but now I'm noticing all of the details that I never really gave much thought before - the music, the specific decorations, the cake, the details of dress.  And how the whole tells a story about the couple.  Also, how much more detail pretty much everyone is putting into the events than I did!

As for using downtime to try and recharge, yesterday was a case in point.  It was rainy, I was tired, and I didn't even manage to get to the dry cleaner's.  I just stayed in all day and read and watched horror movies.  Oh, and I had a nap.  FYI do not bother with "House on Haunted Hill", it's ridiculous.  Also?  the Saw movies are gruesome.  Today I've been doing a little better; I made it to SFMOMA, and I'm making a big crock pot of black bean soup, but I'm also back watching the horror.

Since it's October, there are horror movies aplenty for your pleasure.  I've been learning a lot.
1. Kevin Bacon was in "Friday the 13th".
2. There was a movie I saw in the dorm basement freshman year that had a scene where a girl preparing for a hot date took off black panties and replaced them with brown ones.  We thought that was hilarious.  the movie was on again last week: "Friday the 13th part II"  Mystery solved!  Also, it was silly.
3. I knew this already but reconfirmed, "28 Days Later" could have been WAY better.  Note to writers, if you have someone with a rage virus that makes them attack anything that moves, you will only have one left alive in any one place, they will not run in packs. 

I will totally be watching "The Walking Dead".  Now that Mad Men is over, and there's no sign yet of the next Breaking Bad, I need something to watch, and I do like the zombie stories.  I hope it's good.

I've also been doing a little light artwork.  More details to follow, I don't want to ruin any surprises!

I have a couple of ideas for actual focused posts - I just need to get it together and get myself writing again!  But first, I must find some time to put together a costume for a "sci fi horror" themed party next weekend.  I'm kind of at a loss.  I think I know what I'll be doing with my hair, but it's too late to make anything with good tentacles, so I'll see what I can dig up next week.  Any suggestions, leave them in the comments!

I'll be back...

Wind and rain, fire and dust

Metropolis, this year's Burning Man, was fun!

It didn't start out fun, though - Kent's been traveling a lot and the preparations sneaked up on me, and we weren't working as a team in getting it all together.  We'll be going back to lists and prepping at least a month out next time.  We ended up forgetting a few things and doing without or stopping on the way up.

We tried a different approach this year in going up and arranged to stay the night in Sparks, just east of Reno.  The big plan was to get an early start and get to the gate on Monday morning.  The last two years, we'd gotten there in midafternoon, just in time for long dust storm delays, and had to set up after dark.  We got to Sparks kind of late, around 9 pm on Sunday, and the only place for dinner was the dineresque restaurant in the casino.  After we ate, Kent went to the truck to make sure the bikes were locked down, and while I was waiting, I put $1 into a penny "Sea Monkeys" slot.  I set for a 5 cent spin, and immediately won some free spins.  For the next 10 minutes or so, I just watched the returns ringing up and up as the slots kept spinning, while "Hey Hey We're the Monkees" played over and over.  At the last part, I selected some icons for a bonus round and ended up winning $40.25 overall.  I cashed out immediately since there was nowhere to go then but down (sorry, mom).  The winnings paid for drinks and breakfast, yay!  We left around 9 the next morning and got near the gate by 11.

Unfortunately, we then ran into the back end of a line.  We waited for two hours, inching up, and got to the camp area around 1 or 2.  We had set up the tent trailer and were starting on the shade structure when the storm hit.  High winds, and lots of really cold rain.  We called it when the big, stinging drops started hitting, and went inside.  We got some books out and were settling in, when we looked outside and saw our friends Barry and Kraig hanging onto their shade structure for dear life, the same structure that had collapsed in a similar storm three years ago.  We ran out and tried to help to batten down the hatches, getting soaked in the process.  The structure held up OK (despite the small things we were able to do), and the storm died down.  We were cold then, and ended up staying in for the night.

The pace picked up over the course of the week - most of the time the weather was beautiful (with one exception of Friday, when it was oppressively hot), and there was some good art out there.  Our What When Where (WWW) guides were a little messed up, but we still found some activities to check out.

The art that blew everyone away this year was Bliss Dance.  During discussions in camp, we'd talk about what was out there, and Bliss really topped the list.  I got some pictures of other artwork out there - I like to find it by riding out into the playa and just picking out something interesting looking - and there is ALWAYS something interesting looking!  The outer playa was soft and difficult to ride a bike on, but it was OK for walking and the access roads were fine for the bike, so I still got to explore pretty widely.

One of the bad karma installations was the fake porta potties.   The fronts were arranged all in a row like a regular row of portas, including marker posts, way out in the playa.  Very naughty artists!  You could see people walking through the doors and looking confused.  I'm pretty sure that some of them peed on the installation out of spite.

My favorite WWW find this year was the Silence of the Lambs Dance Contest.  Here is the blurb:

Do your best Buffalo Bill to Goodbye Horses.  Will it rub the lotion on its skin or will it get the hose again?  Costumes encouraged!  Prizes!

It started a little late (playa time), and they spent some time culling "volunteers" passing by on the Esplanade.  There were about ten contestants, and they all stripped down and danced to "Goodbye Horses", just like Buffalo Bill in the movie.  Most of them were not that great although game, a couple were creepily good, but the win went to a guy who did a crowd-pleasing trick of tucking without using his hands (I don't think he was the best dancer).  He got a basket of lotion, the others got cold water from the hose.   Yes, I got pictures; no, I will not be posting them online.  You're welcome.

(for the record, my all-time favorite WWW find was the Wet Burqa Contest a few years back.  SO WRONG)

We also saw a really good folk singer at Center Camp (John Craigie, although I can't find "Burning Man Blues" online), a yacht art car, cupcake art scooters (yay cupcakes!), mojitos at sundown, a huge fire sphere, cold garlic pickles after being out in the hot dusty wind, and some lovely connections with campmates and new people we met while out and about.    Being out at night was hit and miss - sometimes the cacophony from the sound camps and art cars (which apparently have no decibel controls) was oppressive, and other times it was a leisurely wander with friends hunting down blinky things in the dark.

Unfortunately Jacques and Christian couldn't find us, so we didn't see as much of them as we'd have liked (we did find each other after everyone was established somewhere), and I couldn't find some other friends at all, but overall the trip was a success! 

Saturday night (when the Man burns) was a little anticlimactic.  We stayed out too late having cocktails at a friend's camp at sundown, and by the time we got back to camp everyone else had already left.  We changed and went out, and walked right into what may have been the biggest dust storm of the week.  The fireworks started when we were walking out, so we saw those, and we saw the man collapse, but aside from that it was darkness and glowing dust.  My hat blew off and I had to chase it, and then come back looking for the head lamp (miraculously found).  We called it early on Saturday night since the storm was holding hard and we planned to leave early on Sunday.

We left on Sunday morning, managing to leave camp around 8 am.  We got to the freeway in just under an hour (score!), and took the scenic road home.  We stopped for lunch in Boomtown (note: Denny's scares me; deep fried pancake batter with Oreo pieces?  eek!), then went on to Grass Valley, cleaned up the trailer, and came home by 9 pm.

Pictures will be coming to shutterfly soon!  Keep checking...  In the mean time, here are some links to other pictures:
Spench's pictures
sfgate's pictures

Deceptively busy

I haven't posted anything in a while - it just seemed like there hasn't been anything really going on to write about.  And then I think about what has happened recently.  Within the last three weeks:

• Lynn (Kent's sister) was on a big road trip with her daughter Brooklyn and two of Brooklyn's softball teammates, and came through over two weekends.  We walked around SF with them a couple of times, had Indian food, cooked big meals at the house, went to the zoo, and had a good time. 
• We went to Outside Lands music festival in Golden Gate Park both days last weekend.  In the fog.  Lots of good music, some fun events, and some old crank moments (ARGH YOU DAMN KIDS!  STOP SHOVING!).
• We saw the Reverend Horton Heat (awesome) at the Fillmore (double awesome), but it was on a school night and I had to pull the plug at 11:30 pm.  And I was proud of myself that I'd even made it that long!
• I spent two days in Los Angeles meeting with precious metals reclaimers.  At one site I got to hold about $300,000 worth of platinum (a bit over 10 lb), and saw a platinum-wire-weaving machine (the resulting pads are used for nitric acid production).  So cool.  The only downside was in hanging out with sales guys for six solid hours.  That is exhausting.
• I have taken three classes in poi spinning (no, I cannot do what's in that video.  yet.).  I won the class in a raffle and have been having fun in the class and am very grateful that I have done a little of it before.  Despite that, I have been beaning myself with my tennis ball poi. The circles behind the back are really killing me; I need shin pads and a helmet until I can get the plane of the spin stabilized.  I have three more classes in regular poi spinning, and then I MOVE ON TO FIRE POI.
• An old childhood friend, Cathy (I've known her since I was in kindergarten), was in town last week and we had dinner with them and with our Vancouver friends who were down for Outside Lands.  We had ribs for days.  No, literally - we were eating ribs for days in a row.  They were good, but man.  That was a lot of ribs.  Cathy's doing really well, and looks great; we got caught up on each other's families, and I pressured her to get on facebook.  Heh heh.
• I have been continuing the "drink from the fire hydrant" approach to trying to learn my new job.  The guys I'm getting turnover from are leaving after next week.  GAH!!  My main goal is to avoid making mistakes that are too expensive. 

Tomorrow is all about errands, and I am doing some things on Saturday that I will write about later.

But yeah, as you can see, it's been quiet around here.  How are things with you?

Mom is done with chemo!

Great news everyone!  Mom is done with Chemo, her blood counts are looking good, and everyone is in high spirits.  Here is the latest report from Dad.

I think we're done with treatment.

The results from today's blood test show Fran's white cells are in the normal range, her red cells are low but holding steady, and her platelets are on the way up. That is good news all way around. The appointments we had on the schedule next week have been canceled. The PICC line was removed.

We have an appointment to see the doc's nurse practitioner next week. I really have no idea what we'll be talking about. I'm hoping that we won't be going back there for three months or so.

There really is no test to say Fran is completely cured. The only thing which might snow a recurrence is a PET scan. When I questioned the doc about the test before leaving the last chemo session he drug his feet a couple moments before saying maybe one could be done a few months out.

Fran is back to being her normal happy self. Her energy levels are good, but her endurance is a bit low. That will come back with time. Her hair continues to fill in and lengthen; she's not far from shedding the kerchiefs she's been wearing to avoid scaring little children. The wig we bought so many months ago has never been worn. We may donate it to the Rocky Mountain Cancer Center, where her doc practices, along with a number of other head coverings we acquired along the way which simply didn't suit her.

This note will be the last one planned in this long running series. Only if something truly amazing or untoward comes up will another be sent to this group.

Thanks once again for all the healing thoughts, marrow prayers and general helping juju. They all made life easier for us both

Kudos to all!  Excellent job Mom, keeping your spirits up (including the fighting one), and kicking cancer's ass!  And Dad, caretaking is an extremely difficult job - you did great!

Thanks to everyone who sent thoughts and prayers.  They helped the whole family.  We are all hoping that that is that for the cancer treatment (I am willing to do some good luck rituals to help with this), and that everyone enjoys the best of health!  Although it has been a scary journey for everyone, I think a good thing that came from it is that it has shaken up the complacency we have in taking each other for granted.

Love to all!

Just another reason to love the Pet Shop Boys

I was working on a new gym playlist last week, and I had put a Pet Shop Boys' song, "Love Etc." on.  This is one of those notorious earworm tracks, that keeps playing on a loop in your brain after you've shut the ipod off.

The song is about how you can never have enough of anything, even if you're appallingly rich, and there is a line that goes, "you need more than the Gerhard Richter hanging on your wall".

This line played over and over and over and over and over in my brain and I finally looked up Gerhard Richter.

Flash back to the early 2000s.  I saw a great exhibit at SF MOMA by a painter with a huge array of styles.  The abstracts were very interesting but it's the photo paintings that really blew my mind; all of the paintings were visually compelling, but I didn't make a note of the artist's name, and didn't know where to start looking.  You can see where this is going.  IT WAS GERHARD RICHTER.

Oh Neil and Chris, what would I do without you?

Relativity and Housewarming

The pace is starting to pick up at work.  I spent quite a bit of time this week on updating a spreadsheet so it would be easier to use, listening to disco while clicking away.

Kent, on the other hand, was in New Mexico this week, where he is installing a solar field.  There was an emergency helicopter landing, a BLM guy with a truck full of guns crashing the gate in pursuit of domestic sheep (the emergency - they might be near bighorns), dust storms, lightning storms, and last minute permitting saves.

Job interest: Kent - 1, Derende - 0.

We finally had our housewarming party yesterday, after 9 months in the house.  We got up at 7:30 and immediately started on all the cleaning and food shopping we hadn't managed to do ahead of time.  We barely finished when people started showing up at 2; we were still setting out food and my hair was wet.

The weather cooperated and we had sun and temperatures in the 70s.  Over the course of the afternoon we had about 50 people come through, and it was a lot of fun, although I felt like I was only talking to people a couple of minutes at a time, with one exception - our elderly neighbor called to let us know she couldn't come, and was so upset she started crying in the message.  I took a plate of food over for her, and... well, she is a nice lady, but she is a talker, and it's usually hard to extricate yourself in a polite way once she starts.  I was over there for over 40 minutes.  It turned out that one of her friends had died on Monday and she was in pain from an injury.  Very sad, and extra hard to get away, even with a house full of guests to get back to. 

Some people were kind enough to bring flowers, they are beautiful, but I really fear for the live orchids.  I can kill lantana and bamboo, I don't think the orchids stand a chance, poor things! 

Another area of danger is that our house is not babyproofed.  Some friends brought their young son, about one, who's just started walking recently and hasn't sorted out his motor skills yet.  He blacked his eye on the dining table corner - looked for all the world like he'd been in a baby bar brawl.  Later in the party, he was playing with a wooden drawing figure I have; when we looked down it and his hands were covered in blood.  What the what!  As it turned out, he'd gone exploring in the kitchen cabinets and found a food processing  blade.  He didn't seem bothered until mom and dad started trying to clean the cut and put a band-aid on it.  Poor baby!  At least that means that the blade is so sharp it didn't really hurt him, and it should heal well.  I felt bad, but heard that the evening before, he'd put his hand in an old fashioned metal-blade fan.  The other youngsters escaped without injury... I think!

I am afraid to look in the recycle bin to see how much wine we got through.
We were here with the last guest around 10:30 when our neighbor called again, telling us she mistakenly drank some water with bleach in it and could we get her some water?  WTF?  Se both went over (figured it was easier to get away with two of us than one, and we weren't sure what kind of help she would need).  She said she didn't swallow more than a sip and didn't want to go to the hospital, but she was confused about how much fresh water she had set aside.  We got her set up and said good night.  If this becomes a regular thing we may need to alert senior services, or something - we'll see how it goes.

The cleanup hasn't been too bad, nothing was broken.  However, our grand plans of going to Marin for a daytime party today fell through when I fell asleep and didn't wake up for four hours.  Oops.

Thanks to everyone who came, we had a great time!  We'll have to throw more parties, I miss hanging out with people (and need to get enough sleep in the week that I can make it to other events - very poor showing there).

She's baaaaaack!

Kent had to go to his east bay house today because his dishwasher was in the latest Maytag recall.  He was working on the drip system out front when the crazy neighbor came out and started taunting him.  He finally asked her what her real problem was (my own theory: she is low on lithium), and she told him that he beats women.  The huh?  He asked how she knew, had she seen him?  And then she started yelling gibberish, he told her she was even crazier than he thought, and she went into her house.

I guess she must stew after confrontations, too, since shortly after that she came out and told him "You can suck your dick!" 

Now, that is funny.  I told him he should have told her he couldn't, he tried.  (HA HA HA)  I am sorry I wasn't there, just for missing that fine salvo.

She only gets really nasty and confrontational like that when no one else is around (the husband/daddy/uncle/whatever, or the kid).  The theory now is that she lives in a really repressive and maybe abusive household, and projects and lashes out where she knows it's safe.  Sad yes; license to act like a junkyard bitch, no.  Take your lithium, woman.

No video, unfortunately.  I know her youtube audience misses her.

Am I set to broadcast?

So I read a book recently that I'd seen mentioned on an arts and culture blog, "Sag Harbor" by Colson Whitehead.  The reviewer had all kinds of glowing things to say about the author, so I got a copy to check it out.

The premise: it's a series of short stories told from the point of view of a 15-year-old black boy summering in 1985 in Sag Harbor (close to the Hamptons, the big NYC summering area).

The stories themselves are evocative, and they tend to wander around the main points, but there were two parts that really caught my attention:

"As former twins, Reggie and I were driven by the fear of being shortchanged, that the other might get a bigger portion of the available resources in our household, whether they be emotional, material, or entirely imagined.  Your brother, your de facto opponent in a hundred battles a day, big and small, must not receive more than his share because that meant that you were receiving less than your share."

Two things crossed my mind here: 1) now no one will think my weight theory was mine (which I still stand by), and 2) GET OUT OF MY HEAD!.

"No, I spent my money on music for moping.  Perfect for drifting off on the divan with a damp towel on your forehead, a minor-chord soundtrack as you moaned into reflecting pools about your elaborate miserableness.  The singers were faint, androgynous ghosts, dragging their too-heavy chains across the plains of misery, the gloomy moors of discontent, in search of relief.  Let's just put it out there: I liked the Smiths."

GAH!!  GET OUT OF MY HEAD!! 

Recommended reading!

P.S.  The Smiths rock!

Busy busy!

I seem to be having one of those productive-type weekends.  Woo hoo!  Unfortunately part of what I'm working on is making a bigger mess in the name of cleaning something up.

Rather than treat you to a drawn out story of what's going on here, I'll do this in bullet point form.

Off we go!

• I'm pulling boxes of papers out of the office closet and unpacking them.  I'm separating items out to shred or recycle in the first round.  This is the part that, unfortunately, has led to two rooms covered in open boxes and stacks of paper.
• Second round, I'll be separating remaining papers to group them with high granularity (utility bills here, credit card statements here, etc)
• Did a few loads of laundry
• cleaned kitchen
• went out last night and spent most of the evening drinking margaritas at Robert and Alan's gorgeously remodeled house
• realized our nice new large roasting pan is slightly too big to fit into our wall oven.  Damn!
• Went to the farmer's market and got a chicken, peaches, brussels sprouts and strawberries.  I love the farmer's market, especially in summer.  We got there too late for blackberries or basil.
• went to the cheese store and got a young goats-milk gouda
• went to the grocery store and got blackberries, baking soda, and unsalted butter.  I really will start baking any day now.
• found my old passport and discovered that I spent 71 days in the UK in the early 90s, so I am able to donate blood and possibly also platelets
• got passport pictures taken and put together a package to get my passport renewed.  The pictures look terrible but are pretty true to life for how I look after 12 hours on a plane.

Still on my list for the rest of today:

• roast chicken and brussels sprouts
• ready papers for round 2 of organization
• get some gym playlists together for my ipod - I've been promising to bring some in for a couple of months
• decide how short to go with the haircut coming next weekend.  Hmmmmm.

It's so much easier to be energetic when the sun is out!

Pardon our dust.

I'm in the process of changing the look of the blog and - perhaps foolishly - am stumbling around in the new templates that Blogger has to offer.  One thing that I can't seem to change is moving the blog title over so that it's centered in the header, but whatever.  Adding spaces to force them over isn't working.  If I get annoyed enough I will just go back to something remedial, or will have to learn HTML to tweak the base code.

Good times, yes?

Brace yourself for more changes and perhaps some difficulty in colors and reading items - unfortunately the edit functions don't allow an active preview of what I'm doing.  Due to this you can watch my blog view totals skyrocketing any time I'm trying to work in here.

Other news: I'm continuing on the learning curve for the new assignment at work.  I had yesterday off and got some good stuff done (Kent and I consolidated our insurance policies), and some wild goose chases. 

First, I spent some time at the IRS office to be told I misread something. 

Then I tried to give blood at USCF.  This is the first step in being able to donate platelets.  Unfortunately, I could not remember how much time I spent in the UK between 1991-1996.  Now I have to find my passport from then and add it up - I'm estimating 8-10 weeks, but if I was there for 90 days or more, I'm permanently deferred from blood donations due to a risk of carrying "mad cow".  I'd have thought it would manifest by now if I had it, but maybe not.  Or, maybe that explains my memory issues (yeah, it's not aging, it's prions!).

It's Pride weekend in SF and there are parties and events aplenty.  Yesterday was cold and miserable (especially last night, high winds and we were socked in with fog), but it's all blue skies so far today.  Tomorrow, parade day, they're forecasting 70 degrees and sunny.  If that happens, the Civic Center is going to be a sea of shirtless, toned men, which I think I need to see.  I also heard that Andy Bell is playing the main stage, which is even more enticement.

So, I am off to do some Suzie Housewifely chores, and then out into the fray.  Happy Pride!

Theory: Weight and Relationships

You've heard the stories, and, like me, you may have seen the signs.  When you're single, you tend to weigh less than when you're in a relationship.  I realize this is not what happens to everyone, but apparently I'm one of the people this happens to.  My new "normal" is higher than my older "normal". So, what is it?

My newest theory is that it's my competitive nature.

When I was a kid, fairness in the amount of food I got vs. what my sister got was a hot button.  When mom would heat up a can of Spaghetti-O's for us to share, if we didn't each have the exact same number of meatballs, there'd be a scene.  If the number of meatballs in the can was odd, one would have to be cut in half to keep peace in the house.

Now, I don't expect to eat as much as Kent does, but I think I still eat more than I do when I'm on my own, and I think it comes down to subconsciously thinking I'm not getting my fair share if I eat sparingly.  Silly, right?  But I end up feeling full more often than I used to (when I would aim for feeling 70% full).  And, of course, filling up more often can lead to, how shall we say, a shift in the calorie equation.

Of course, it could also be due to metabolism shifts, or eating on a schedule rather than checking appetite, but I'm liking my competitiveness theory.

The one friend I floated this idea to says that he weighs more in his relationship because his partner cooks real meals and serves large portions, but when he's on his own he makes something simple and small.  So, my theory does not apply in his case.

What do you think?

I think I need to get more conscious (again) about what I'm eating, and make sure that I'm hungry first before eating something.

Things I have been procrastinating on

It's been one of those days where I'm finally getting to projects that I have been meaning to get to for... well, a long time.  We don't really need to know details on some of this, do we?  No, we don't.

One thing that's been lurking is a stack of papers in the office.  Don't get too excited, the stack is still there, but now it's free of broken glass (one of the diplomas fell a while back and the glass broke and got everywhere - big chunks were picked up but there were still slivers all through the papers).  Over the next week(s) I'll be sorting those papers, and also need to go through papers I just stuffed into boxes before the move.  Hopefully a lot will just be recycled, but I do need to update all my files and get a nice file cabinet and get everything in order.  Now I'm wishing I held onto the beat up metal file cabinet I had at my old house.

One thing I found in the stacks of paper is a tax refund check from just over a year ago.  Uh oh.  Hopefully I can still cash that.  I didn't realize I was that disorganized.  It's small, but still, it's money.

I also went through the refrigerator and took out the shelves and washed them.  Something (I suspect a box of stock) had spilled and got everywhere.  I haven't done the door shelves yet but they were definitely out of the drip range.  I also cleaned up the coffee in the freezer and found its source - an open bag of coffee on its side.  There is a whole pork loin in there too that we should do up sometime when we have a bunch of people over.  Hmmmmm, maybe the housewarming?

Other things are lurking on the list:
1) organize papers (see above)
2) call arborist to clear the rest of the dodgy branches off the monster tree and take out some of the smaller trees (seriously, we are overrun).
3) do living will paperwork and get a revised will in order
4) consolidate insurance policies.  Now would probably be a good time to see if we can get a better rate somewhere else.  An insurance broker would probably be the easiest way to do this.
5) get rid of items - recycle old electronics, donate old clothes and doodads, recycle cardboard, sell the wrong chair slipcovers, etc.
6) go through other boxes and get stuff put away, or get it out of the house (see 5)
7) make cupcakes

Still, I'm glad the glass is cleaned up and the fridge is clean.  That had been bothering me.  Next stop: cleaning the bathroom.  Can't wait!

Transitional

I'm in transition to the new job now.  For the last week or so I've been tracking down loose ends for the project I was on for the last year and a half.  I have one more to finish this afternoon and that should be it for me on that project.  The short term is over and I will not be working with the drama manufacturer any more.  Whew!

The new job, however, is going to be a veritable data tsunami for a while.  Luckily I am taking over duties being done by two guys who won't be leaving for a couple of months, so I have more than a week for getting turnover.  Once I get access to the key systems, I will also be taking a look to see what improvements can be made to make them easier to use and/or understand.  And, of course, I'll be documenting the snot out of everything.  People make fun of me for documenting things, but it's saved my bacon (and theirs, AHEM) enough times that I do it in every job.  (plus, if I don't organize things, I can't find anything)

I'll probably be spending a good chunk of this weekend getting things done around the house.  Small jobs have been lurking ever since the move.  I finally made some headway in my closet last weekend (and am appalled at the number of excess wire hangers in there - those are going to the dry cleaners), but the office is all stacks of stuff that need sorting and filing, and I have boxes of stuff I have been hiding in the guest room that need going through.  A lot of stuff will probably be donated or set aside for a garage sale.  I also need to find a place to stash all my art supplies.

Mom had her second consolidation round of chemo last week.  They reduced her dose since she ended up having such a hard time with the first round; she sounded good when she got home, and we'll be keeping watch on her.  I'm hoping that she will get to spend the next 3 weeks at home in really boring ruts.  She's had too much medical drama already.  Please keep sending your good thoughts!

Kent's been traveling again so things are pretty quiet.  Something has been bothering me lately and I hadn't been able to pinpoint it.  Then, I watched the Glee episode with the Gaga covers, and I think I figured it out.  My freak flag has not been flying.  I haven't figured out yet what to do about this, but stay tuned - some changes are coming soon.  Any suggestions, leave them in the comments!

Raccoon Rumpus Room

We've spent the holiday weekend at home.  Our main objective for the weekend was to clean up the mess in the crawl space. 

Not our raccoon, but an image from the web.  Little rotter.

We have one crawl space under the addition which was put on the house in 1976.  When the inspector was here, he opened the door and all we could see was plumbing and swaths of pink insulation.  Some of it was hanging from the joists, and it looked like the space had a pink carpet down.  "Yep," said Mr. Inspector, "Looks like you got some visitors, here,"  Great.

A few months back, Kent had opened the door to the crawl space in the garage and was confronted by a raccoon butt.  He made a lot of noise (I wondered was what going on down there when I suddenly heard a lot of yelling and banging), and two raccoons left via the space under the laundry room.  We immediately went out and blocked their entry point with cinder blocks.  We saw evidence that they tried to get back in, but they couldn't move the blocks far enough.  We've been talking for months about needing to go down to the crawl space to clean up after them.

We finally decided a couple of weeks ago that we were going to do the job this weekend.   We got ourselves outfitted with personal protective equipment (PPE): respirators with dust cartridges (just like in my profile photo!), safety glasses, yellow gloves, headlamps, hats, kneepads, and paper coveralls.  This was more for minimizing contact with the fiberglass, but also because we didn't know what we would find down there. 

We'd originally intended to do the job on Friday and just couldn't get ourselves to do it.  Saturday, we promised ourselves.  We would definitely do it on Saturday.

Saturday morning, we got up, and still managed to procrastinate for two hours before dragging ourselves unwillingly down to the garage, and getting suited up.  Opening the door let a dank breeze out, and our first look in at what we were dealing with.

The first thing we did - primarily because it was easier - was to clear the spot directly under the staircase.  We found a very surprising amount of pane glass there; we think it was courtesy of the former owners and some project they did.  Thanks!  Oh, and have we thanked you again lately for ripping up carpet when you moved out?  So thoughtful!  We took the glass out and then cleared out a bunch of ripped up insulation.  Apparently this was the loft of the raccoon halfway house.  It turns out that the bathroom fan is venting directly into this space, but we will have to deal with that later (at least this bathroom is primarily used when we have guests so it's not a constant moisture problem).

As luck would have it, the design of the crawl space is not that good.  the entry is blocked by drain lines and water supply lines, so you have to crawl over and under those to get into the space.  The floor of the crawl space is concrete.  At first, I thought that was a good thing - my last house had a dirt floor - but I quickly changed my mind when we found out that the surface had never been smoothed.  We'd be working on a rough surface full of rocks.  Grand!  Fortunately we had some large pieces of cardboard to lay on which helped some.

I went in first since I'm smaller and fit into confined spaces easier.  The first thing I did before going all the way in was to do a sweep with the light to make sure that nothing was moving around in there.  I didn't see anything, so I started by clearing out the entry, pulling down loose bits, picking insulation off the floor, and using wires to put mostly intact insulation pieces back up into the joist spaces.  The work was slow and tedious.  In some spaces, the insulation was just tamped down a little, and would come up in a big mat.  In some, though, it was tamped down and torn up and tamped down some more and possibly peed on, and it was really difficult to get off the floor.  In those cases, tweezing the stuff out of the floor while wearing rubber gloves was the only way to get it out (and we would get to a point of "good enough" before moving on since it was impossible to get it all).  I did one swath and realized that the builders had put up concrete walls without openings, and completely blocked access to two sections of the crawl space, at least one of which was definitely infiltrated by raccoons.  I haven't checked but we may be able to get in there if we remove part of the wall in the garage.

By the way, if you want to protect yourself from fiberglass, don't bother with the paper coveralls from the paint section of the hardware store.  If you can, find Tyvek instead, which is lined with plastic.  And wear long sleeves!  I found that applying duct tape to my arms and peeling it off helped some, but I'd rather have avoided getting poked up in the first place.  But back to the action!

I had to get out and take a break after a while - moving around in a narrow space like that is hard on the neck and shoulders.  Kent was in at the time and when I went back in he told me that he'd discovered the raccoon latrine.  AWESOME.  I spent about an hour trying to make some progress back there.  The raccoon poops were dried out and not really a problem, but the insulation back there was a nightmare of trying to tweeze up off the floor.  Grrrrr.  I was getting more tired and moving more and more slowly, and by the time we finished and got out, I was physically exhausted. 

We'd been down for five hours altogether.  We filled four large contractor bags with insulation, poops, and assorted treasures.  One that really threw me was something that looked an awful lot like a turkey drumstick.  What the what??  I slowly worked towards it and when it was close enough I gave it a cautious poke.  It turned out to be a dog's squeaky toy, with one end chewed off.  Huh.  At least it wasn't a buried pair of tidy whities, like at my old house. 

so, the nastiest part of the crawl space work is done, but we still have a few things to do down there:
1) re-insulate the joist spaces where the raccoons tore insulation out (this goes surprisingly quickly - use totally encased insulation for best results!)
2) replace corroded screens to keep the beasties out
3) run coax cable to the back part of the house (should be fast)
4) route the bathroom vent to the outside
5) put down a thick layer of plastic.  This would act as a vapor barrier, but also make the rocks a little easier to move on, and would cover the remaining fiberglass on the floor.

All in all, probably another two full days of work (not counting getting under the laundry room), and we shouldn't have to go back under the house again for a long, long time.  I look forward to that day.  In the mean time, I'm off to nurse my sore muscles and bruises.

May minutiae

Lots of things are going on now, and I'm tempted to make a vulgar joke about lots of balls in the air.  But I won't.  Aren't I a model of restraint?  (stifling... restraint... jokes....)

Work continues to be its charming self.  I didn't think it was possible, but the team is getting even more fractured as the end approaches.  Since the Troublemaker goes on vacation in a week, I'm going to do my best to take the reins at our meeting tomorrow, and get everything on track for what we need for next week's big presentation.  This is in my best interest since I suspect I'm the one that's going to be presenting everything.  Can't wait!  (/sarcasm)

Shhhh- I've got a secret to tell you after the jump...

No routine.

I'm a bad blogger.  BAD!  Everything has seemed to be taking up lots of time lately, but I have to admit that a lot of time has been spent sleeping and hanging out with friends.  However, blogging has not been far up on my list.  I'll get better.

Most of my energy has been spent at work lately.  The project I've been working on for the last few weeks is partly done, but the last four weeks are really going to be hectic.  I have my Can't-Apparently-Live-Without-Drama co-worker to thank for that.  His intentions are fine but he doesn't seem to realize how he can get everyone riled up when it's really not necessary.  We really should have worked out who was in charge of the effort, him or me.  It would also have helped if I had insisted that one of these guys get trained to do the analysis themselves, but I couldn't get that going, and now am the only person doing the number crunching. On Thursday, CALWD just announced he's taking vacation for two of the last four weeks of the effort.  Although I'm seeing the silver lining now (less drama than usual for two weeks), my main response is still:  GAH!!!

It's a short-term problem.  The project has a hard stop in four weeks. So there's that.

Mom's been home from the hospital for about a week and it sounds like she and dad are settling into quiet routines, which is the best thing.  She'll have her next round of chemo in about three weeks, so please keep her in your thoughts!  She likes getting little notes, too, so if you're so inclined, please drop her a few words of encouragement.

In other news, our friend Lisa was in town for a couple of weeks for work.  She's currently based in Perth so we only get to see her a couple of times a year.  We were treated to an evening at AsiaSF (followed by an unusually nasty hangover), and on Friday we had a little gathering at our house so people could hang out with her.  We had about 20 people, Thai food, and cocktails, and a good time was had by all. 

Kent and I spent much of yesterday running errands in the East Bay, before meeting our friends Bruce and Rebecca for dinner (slow cooked lemon olive chicken, yum!).  Kent's already off for a few days in Bakersfield and New Mexico, and I'll see him when we go to visit mom and dad in Denver next weekend.  So far married life has been pretty solitary, but that's fine too - I know how it is to travel for work and at least I can call him since the trips are domestic.

In movie news, we've recently watched "The Station Agent" (rather nice) and "Maya Lin: A Strong Clear Vision".  The Maya Lin movie (she was the designer of the Vietnam Veteran's memorial in DC) is very interesting in its discussion of artistic visions, and includes some fascinating commentary by Maya about what was behind the works, and the issues that come up with installation.  This, along with "Rivers and Tides" (the Andy Goldsworthy documentary), are two of the most interesting descriptions of the artistic process I've seen.  (sigh)  I'll get back to doing art again some day, too.

New stressors!

I thought that once the wedding was over, I'd have all kinds of spare time to get back to doing fun stuff, and there would be a big weight taken off my shoulders.  I thought I might even be bored.  However, I've been finding that my fuse was extremely short last week.  I attribute this to feeling like I'm getting more than my share of things to do.  Work in particular is galling - when people are refusing to learn what to do to help me, but getting more work and short deadlines, all of which will be on my head, it's been making me really angry.  Throw a "15 minute meeting" that takes two hours on top of that, all to rehash stuff we've talked about several times already, and GRRRRRRRRR.

We're in the midst of a restructing at work, so I'm keeping in mind that the current situation is, by definition, short-lived.  I'm going to do my best to work through it and make sure that my attention is on the priorities for getting my part (ha ha) of the work done, and done well.  I'm trying to prune some parts that don't look like they will be formed enough to model, with only partial potential success - we'll see how it goes.  I need to be not only assertive (which is not working on its own), but figure out how to get people to pay enough attention that they understand what the problems are.

The restructure itself is getting interesting.  My part of the company is cutting way back, and my current work group is being eliminated.  The new assignments are being done in groups at the same level, and most of my work group is in the same level as me.  We each have to apply for five open positions this week, and they will be filling all the positions in a couple of weeks.  There's a lot of maneuvering going on, and people are getting (more than a) little weird.  The mood on the hallway here is punchy, but they call it gallows humor for a reason!  One advantage to having a career that's run wide and shallow is that a lot of the jobs are potentially good fits, and I know a lot of the different groups already.  I'll keep you all posted on progress, but we should hear the results in two weeks.

I had some fun over the weekend, hanging out with friends.  Word to the wise, though - if you have a slight Chianti hangover, don't drink a cup of coffee, skip eating breakfast, and then ride in a back seat up highway 1.  Guaranteed car sickness, even if it's minor.

Mom had to go back to the hospital on Sunday, with a fever.  She's been pumped full of antibiotics and we've been told she has a blood infection, and the culprit is a skin bacteria.  They took out her PICC line (an IV to the chest vein that has multiple ports) when she was discharged after chemo, so they've had to stab her several times a day over the last few weeks.  And yet, somehow, they expect us to buy that the infection was from the PICC line.  These guys are starting to piss me off, not least because not all the sticks are necessary ("Oops, we forgot to get some for matching when we took your blood two hours ago!  Give us your arm!").  Dad is asking them today about why she doesn't have a more permanent implant to avoid all the sticks (which would at the very least protect her veins, which are collapsing).  They can't do one now, since her immune system has been compromised by the chemo, but maybe she can get one when she's better.  She also has a blood clot in one arm (related to the STICKS, anyone care to bet??), so now she's getting clot dissolvers, too.  Her fevers are trending down and hopefully she will be allowed to leave the hospital soon. She needs time to regain her strength before she goes in for the second consolidation round.

This weekend will hopefully be quiet, and Kent will be back from New Mexico late tomorrow.  He's been traveling a lot which isn't much fun, but he'll be home the next two weeks.

Sweet, sweet sleep.

Short update, I am still alive! Also still married. So far, so good.

Right after the wedding weekend was over, Kent left on a business trip, and I spent every evening getting the house back in order.  I think every towel in the house got washed, along with every sheet and pillowcase.  Speaking of which, one of our upstairs hand towels has mysteriously become darker and bluer than the other one.  Anyone have a story to share??  Perhaps one involving new jeans that needed a wash?

I can't remember what we did the next weekend, but the weekend after that we took a trip up to Mendocino, about 3 hours north of SF.  There is a vineyard up there we are big fans of (Navarro), and I remembered seeing the coast while going by previously.  It was a very nice, laid-back weekend.  We were the only two on a tour at Navarro.  We had a very good dinner at a restaurant that lost our reservation.  Kent was mad, since the hostess was not apologizing.  We ended up getting seated in the entryway (possible since the restaurant had only two seatings, and we were the later one - there was no in/out traffic), on a buffet table 12" wide.  That was disappointing, but the food was great, and we eventually got an apology and they comped our wine, which was nice.

We had a view of the ocean, rocky beaches, riptides, and all, from the hotel.  We would build a fire and hear the waves coming in, which was very cozy, especially when it was raining.  All in all a nice weekend.  When I get a chance I'll post pictures.

Work is picking up steam again, and this weekend I had to devote a chunk of time to doing taxes.  Fortunately, with my house sale, I was already under the exemption amount, so I didn't have to dig out and add up all my capital improvements.  To which I can only say WHEW, although I should still do that sometime so my records will be complete.  My records from 2009 are not that great with all the upheaval; I have not filed papers in maybe a year, and didn't pay all donations from my checking account which is easier to track.  So, I think I am missing some donations, although at this point I think it would be less painful not to take the deduction than to spend time looking for the proof.  I'll do better this year - especially considering that we are going to take a big tax hit for being married.  Tsk, tsk - should have kept living in sin, I guess.

I've also been doing housework this weekend.  The guest rooms are FINALLY back in order.  At some point I'll have to get to some of the larger projects that have been looming since the move: organizing my closet, going through boxes in the downstairs guest room, filing papers (ahem), organizing the office.  In the mean time, it's raining, and we've been sleeping and cooking and watching TV.  Last night was a roasted chicken with rosemary and on the side, basmati rice; tonight it's macaroni and cheese, and Breaking Bad and the last of season 2 of Mad Men.  Ahhhhh.

Oh, and in Mom news, she had her first (of three) consolidation rounds last week!  She only has to be in the hospital for a week for each of those, rather than a month like for her induction round.  She had very few side effects this time, aside from the taste buds going off by the end of the week.  The anti-nausea drugs worked well, she was able to eat and sleep and get around all week, and her energy levels and moods have been good.  Great work Mom!!!  Her next round will be in early May.  She may be tired this week but so far she's been doing great.  We're all proud of her!

Notes from a Wedding

The wedding was a lot of fun, but even though I tried to pull back and take it in several times, a lot of details are already becoming vague.

Kent and Bruce set up the pergola early in the day. It was a gorgeous day in SF, sunny and temperatures in the 70s. Very uncommon for March.

It was busy for me earlier in the day - I had my hair done, which took less than half an hour, but required half a can of hairspray and about 20 pins. My hair did not move, even when it was breezy. When I got home from the salon, I went down the hill for a manicure, hoping it would take less than an hour. They were able to take me right away, a little guy did my nails and I was out in 45 minutes. I went home, made myself eat something, and Kent and I and my family took 2 cars out to Fort Mason.

When we got there, our friend Kirk was in a tizzy getting flowers together, and the flower assembly got busier when we showed up with more assistants. I brought 3 aprons for flower people to use, but I don't know if they were ever put on. At least, I haven't seen any pictures yet of someone in a plasticized zebra apron working the flowers! We also brought paper flowers made from kits (special thanks to Aly, Heather, Mike and Lori for helping put those together!), and the fresh flowers Kirk put together were gorgeous. Yay!

Lani helped me with makeup and getting dressed. I haven't worn that much makeup since, well, over 10 years at least (maybe my 10 year reunion?). We're talking the full shebang. Foundation. Powder. Blush. Three colors of lipstick/gloss. Eyeshadow. Mascara. Liner. The only thing missing was fake eyelashes. We got me into the dress and jewelry and out for pictures. We did pictures before the ceremony to save time, and also because the light was amazing. Yes, we got at least one wedding picture with Alcatraz in the background. We're all about subtext.

When we were finishing pictures, our guests were starting to arrive, so I had to be sequestered in the side room. The Funston room was the HQ for martial law in the aftermath of the 1906 earthquake - strangely appropriate for a wedding! I was most nervous when I was left by myself in the side room. I could hear the guests milling around outside, but I had nothing to do but think about going out there and having everyone look at me. I considered opening the wine, but didn't want to accidentally overmedicate before the vows. I wish now that I'd asked for crab cakes, they were only passed before the ceremony, and I heard they were great! We got the bottle of Moet back there for after the vows. I also had some nice snacks but kept worrying about the pictures - so my waiting time went snack, check teeth, snack, check teeth, pace, pace, pace. Lani and Kent came in to keep me company while I was waiting.

They came to get us a little before 7. Since mom and dad couldn't be there, we livestreamed the ceremony and some of the party so they could watch from home in real time. We also set it up so our families were out there first, and Kent and I walked out together.

The whole ceremony took less than 8 minutes. :) It seemed longer while we were doing it. An early surprise was Lynn pulling out the "Mawwaige" jokes, which we had joked about but didn't expect! I have the script if anyone is interested, but the basic frame was defining marriage, declaring our intent to get married, getting the guests to state that they would support us in the marriage, our vows, and the exchange of rings. Lynn had a special phrase she had to use as a Deputy Commissioner of Marriage. While we were doing vows, I went first - and while I was talking (probably too fast), Kent started tearing up. I remember thinking, "Oh no! Don't cry, or I'll cry!" Maybe the alarm will show on my face in the video? Fortunately we managed to get through the vows without either of us choking up.

After the ceremony we went back to the Funston room, popped our champagne, and called mom and dad to see if the feed had worked. We asked "Did you see us? Did you see us?" "Yeah!" "Did you wave back at the computer?" "Yeah, we did!" Woo! Dad also said there was a short discussion about the tripod being a piece of crap, guess the video guy forgot they were live. Funny, though, and I'm sure any guests of ours saw the humor in it.

After a few minutes to ourselves, we were ushered in for dinner. I'd been warned to make sure to eat, so I got some food, but I was so keyed up I just couldn't eat much. We chatted with people at our table (including Bill, Rich, Bobbi, Heather, Mike, Aly, and Tish and Jeff). We had a problem during dinner with the food coming out a little slowly which was making some tables cranky, but everyone said the food was great once it was out.

A few people did toasts, and thankfully, a lot of people did NOT stand up and say how they really knew us! One of the really funny ones was the traditional DeBoer family toast at weddings, "out of all the girls Kent's been with we like her the best!" I think all of our sisters got up to say something, including Tish (I couldn't believe she got up to speak in front of 100 strangers), and we had family friends and work friends say things, too.

We did do a cake cutting - we were probably not very visible, since we were in front of the cake table (not behind), but had some nice cake. We were yelled at for taking the bites out of the top tier, but that whole cake was meant to be eaten, so I'm not worried about it. Aside from those two bites and one cupcake each late in the party, we didn't have cake, either, but loved what we had and heard the cakes were a big hit.

We spared people a first dance. Neither of us can dance and there's no point making people watch that. Right after cake cutting, we started the dance music and told the guests to go to it.

The party itself is bit of a blur; there were lots of people I wanted to talk to, and didn't feel like I got even close to spending the time I wanted to with them. A couple of friends got teary, and I was teased about my childhood nickname, and I tried to circulate to everyone (social butterfly fail). I can't wait to see the still pictures from the station where Mark and Branca set up!

My dress was a big hit. YES! I love the dress and need to think of somewhere else I could wear it. I think the girl look on me scared the work people a bit.

By the end of the party, we helped to clear everything out (leave no trace!), packing everything up, and Kent was out on the lawn in the dark with a bunch of helpers to take the pergola down. The pergola will probably make a reappearance in our back yard when we get started on working back there. After everything was packed up and everyone was gone, we walked to our hotel and crashed hard.

Overall I had a lot of fun and am grateful to everyone that made it so special! THANK YOU!

Watch me get married!

I just checked the link that was used to livestream the wedding, and a video is still up! I didn't expect that - I don't know how long it will be online, but for those who couldn't come, this is what mom and dad saw on Friday. I'm thrilled they got to see it in real time (along with some family friends). I hope everyone who watched it live waved back at the computer screen!

We come in around 12:00, we are done around 20:00 - big finish at 20:15. You can't really hear what's happening, but you can figure it out by context. Enjoy!

Watch live streaming video from renaissancerampagesproductions at livestream.com

Also? This is what Lynn surprised us with! Half of the guests loved it, the other half didn't know what was so hilarious.

Tying up loose ends...

And there are SO MANY of them.  I really should carry a list around with me.

I think we have the flower situation mostly sorted out - we bought lots of candles and glassware and branches today, and picked out some flowers that look nice, to buy fresh on Friday.  What kinds are they?  Can't help you there.  They are mostly white, except for the ones that are not.  Some of them are "stock".  Does that help?  I'm taking a quick look for some paper flowers this afternoon, and that will determine exactly which fresh ones we will buy on Friday morning.

I need to go makeup shopping this afternoon.  Don't laugh.  Seriously, the stuff I have is over a decade old.  Not laughing now, are you? 

Caterer is set up.  Last minute cancellations and additions are coming in (so far, net effect on count is zero).  Cake is underway.  I took the dress to the cleaners to have some wrinkles steamed out and am praying that they do not iron the thing instead and melt my dress.  The only backup I have is a black sheath, which will not have the same impact.  Seriously, if they melt my wedding dress I will sue the ass off those people.

Still on the hunt for some earrings to go with the necklace I borrowed from Mom.  Still working the details on teh livestreaming so mom can watch the ceremony from home.

The ironic part here is that I really could use some minions - and I even kind of have some (people offering to help), but I don't know what they could help with!  We'll see who is where, maybe I can make assignments over the next few days.  You - assemble these paper flowers!  You - go get the rental microphone!  You - decide which songs I want on my playlist!  Wait, that's wrong.  See?  I need lists.  And I need to finish my playlist work.

YAAAAAA!  Three days to go!

FWIW the Kabuki Springs spa is lovely and I can wholeheartedly recommend the Bubble Lounge!  But for now - no rest for the wicked.  I need to make a hair appointment.

Reaching critical mass...

Yeah, so I have been bad about the blogging.  There is a whole lot of kerfluffle going on these days, leading up to a mofo of a kerfluffle in the next week. 

Because in a week's time I am going to be MARRIED!!  (incredulous swearing here)

And kittens, if you've been through this yourself, you know - there are a few thousand things that need doing, and they will probably go up until the last minute.  Just putting that sentence together made me want a cocktail.  I'm glad that I'm taking next week off of work, because here is the bare bones agenda:

• Saturday: clean house for arriving family.  Bachelorette party at Bubble Lounge (a place that specializes in champagnes and sparkling wines - danger will robinson).
• Sunday: Kent's mom and oldest sister arrive and will be staying at the house.  I'm going to the Kabuki spa with my friend Lani in the afternoon (detox and relaxation is the plan)
• Monday: currently not scheduled, but this seems to be the best time to shop for accessories and makeup (I need everything waterproof)
• Tuesday: meet Kirk at the SF Flower Mart at 7 am.  I know how to do days off right!  We'll be getting the nonperishables we'll need for decor.
• Wednesday: my sister and niece are coming to town, and we are going to try and meet some friends for lunch.  Wednesday night, Kent's other sister will be arriving with her husband, two kids, and daughter in law.  They're staying in a hotel, so we won't have to shuffle people around on inflatable beds in hallways in the house.
• Thursday: go with Kent's sister to City Hall by 8 am to get the deputization paperwork done.  My other sister and her husband arrive at noon.  Rehearsal at 1:30.  Rehearsal dinner at 5.  Nightlife 6-10 pm.  Kent's nephew arrives sometime on Thursday. 
• Friday: the big day.  Ship sisters and brother in law off to see the ocean first thing in the morning.  Pick up fresh flowers. Pick up dress.  Hair.  Makeup and dress.  Pictures, and then the ceremony and party!  I can already tell it's going to be a blur.  We'll also have to figure out how to get stuff back to the house. 
• Saturday: wine bus - we arranged a tour for the out of towners and will taste at a couple of Russian River wineries.
• Sunday: return some rented stuff if things are open, pick up stuff from friends who helped to gather things on Friday.  Oh yeah, and sleep.
• Monday: take license to SF City Hall to make it official.  Return other rental items.  Go to work in the afternoon (this is all me, by the way - Kent is on a flight for a work trip first thing Monday morning).

So, yeah.  I may blog some, I may not.  We shall see.  In the mean time I'm focusing on breathing without hyperventilating.  Wish me luck!

My favorite part is...

The glasses!  No, wait - the puppet spring!  No, the big finale!  Aaaaahhhh!  It's all SO COOL!

My advice is to set it at as high an HD setting as it will go and watch it full screen.  Back to gushing.

SQUEEEE!

brain dump

There is entirely too much going on.  Check it.

WEDDING
The wedding is now less than three weeks away.  I should be wearing my shoes right now to get them broken in, but am still holed up on the couch (see "sick", below).  There are a lot of things that need doing. 

• I need to choose specifically which flowers to use in decor. 
• I need to pester people who have not RSVP'd, including people who did RSVP but didn't put their names on the card or a return address on the envelope.  Ah the mysteries.  In some cases the postmark (or lack of) is the only clue.
• I need to get the ceremony details worked out. 
• I need a final count for the caterer which will also create final layouts and plans. 
• I need to contact the caterer about borrowing or renting a couple of additional items. 
• I need to see who we can get for videography.
• I need to work out logistics plans to schedule which family members will be at the house when.
• I need to figure out what things I am forgetting I need to do.
• I need a valium.

I met with the planners on Thursday night and actually am a little more freaked out about details than I was.  Kent has action items that he will have to GET ON SOON. (hint hint hint)

MOM
Mom has had a week with big ups and downs and is having some odd emotional reactions (bad, dark-side ones, even to good news).    Her immunity is back up to acceptable levels, so she can walk around, eat raw fruits and vegetables, whatever she likes.  The rash which was causing concern turns out to be most likely a drug reaction to chemotherapy (signs are good, fingers crossed just in case!).  However, when she got the news this morning that it was not a worry, and that she could eat what she wanted and go whereever she wanted and would even be leaving the hospital earlier than expected, she got really upset and anxious.  I don't get it.  Someone will have to ask her what is going on - even get her to talk to one of the in-hospital counselors if possible.  Her being constantly freaked out is confusing and upsetting to people trying to help her.

I've asked if I should go back next weekend to help get her resettled at home (I should look into tickets), but was told only to do it if all the wedding stuff is done and we are idling.  I can pretty much guarantee that I will not be idling before April or May.  We'll see.

One good thing, when I talked to Mom today she was talking about coming out for the wedding.  Yes!  I hope she can make it.

SICK
I woke up this morning with a stomach ache.  It's nothing serious (like the dramatic food poisoning so many friends have seemed to be getting lately), but it's lingered, I've wasted the whole day hanging out on the couch instead of working on the wedding.  Not good.  I'm feeling better now but need to drink some water and try and get something constructive done.

BOOKS
I just finished "Boneshaker" by Cherie Priest.  If you like steampunk, zombies, or Seattle, check it out.  I downloaded a free book, The Apothecary's Daughter", it had high reader ratings but I don't know what it's about.  We'll see.

BLOG
I just switched to the new Blogger posting and editing system.  I can now include jumps!  I'll do this in a future post and test my cliffhanger-writing skillz.  However, I haven't seen where they've hidden the spell check - so we'll see how many I've got here... later.

Rinse. Repeat.

Nothing much to report from here. Mom continues to improve, her blood counts are coming back up (albeit slowly) and her appetite is pretty good. She's still tired, so when we talk on the phone it's short, but she sounds like she's in much better spirits this week. Her hair is starting to come out, but from what I hear she finds this more interesting than distressing (although she doesn't like losing the nice pixie cut she just got).

Work goes on, Kent is in Bakersfield this week, there are still wedding tasks to do, I need to do laundry, I am going to the gym tonight.

This weekend, the photostroll group I just joined will be going to the Chinese New Year fair and parade in SF. I am not sure if rain cancels, but if something happens and I don't photostroll, I am totally napping.

That is all.

Short mom and wedding updates

Mom has been having a rough week. Her blood counts are down, so she's been feeling like hell (touchy stomach, no appetite, food doesn't taste right, HIGH anxiety). She's been sleeping a lot but while awake has had some big mood swings. She usually sounds OK when I talk to her, but I hear that she's also super-anxious and does not ask for help when she gets in a state. Her blood counts should be coming back up soon, hopefully everything else will improve then too.

She's also had fevers on and off all week, which was expected since her immune system was on vacation. I don't know if they ever quite figured out what was causing it (or them), and she developed a rash from something, although it's not clear if that was from an infection, or just a reaction to one of the medications.

One step at a time, mom, eat some ice cream, please take an anti-anxiety pill! Even better, take the THC pill they're offering, they are less of a worry for habit forming and will also make you want to eat something. It's legal.

In my neck of the woods I've been working on getting more of the wedding stuff in order. We got our license at City Hall yesterday (eek!) and met onsite with the caterer and our friend Kirk about layout and decor. I chose tablecloth colors but still have a lot of decisions to make about the flowers. So many details. I like the look of branches and keep having that scene from AbFab run through my head, where Edina tells her daughter to get some flowers out of her room. "They're too English, darling, I need something Japanese. I want stems!" (sorry, couldn't find a video clip)

After the onsite meeting, Kent and I got a drink in the Marina, and good lord, that one "Betel Juice" may as well have been administered by IV. It hit me like a brick wall. We then walked over to Fillmore for an early dinner at the Elite Cafe, ate too much delicious cajun food, and went home. We were asleep by 9. Yes, my party animal days are apparently few and far between these days.

Kent's having his bachelor party outing day today (golf, steakhouse, who knows what else!), so I'll be entertaining myself, and waiting for calls about some furniture Kent just listed on Craigslist before making himself scarce. THANKS, HONEY, I really was going to be bored if I didn't have something else to do. Grrrrr.

Tomorrow: tasting at the caterer's. That should be fun!

Quarantine! (updated)

Mom's blood counts are now crawling around on the floor. This was fully expected, but she is tired and easily overwhelmed. For a few days, she's asked to pass the word on to hold off visiting her in person. She can still take short calls and get cards, though, if you want to do it that way!

She's sleeping most of the time now. She's lost her appetite, so we're trying to think of goodies to tempt her with. She can only eat approved foods from the hospital (a side effect of low blood counts is she has to be very strict with food safety), but we're trying to encourage her to eat whatever sounds good. She'll need more protein as her blood starts to build back up, but for now we're just trying to get some calories in there. Fortunately she was eating really well last week, so a day or two of low intake shouldn't hurt too much.

A couple of friends have suggested that she can now get, shall we say, appetite-enhancing drugs (cough-THC-cough) but I can't think of how we might convince her that this is a good idea. That they are available in caramel cube form may help, though!

So, mom doesn't have any fevers or anything, and is doing as well as could be expected, and is in good hands. So we just need to wait for her blood generators to start turning back on and doing their job.

Watch for more updates soon. If you have any suggestions for tempting someone without an appetite to eat, leave them in the comments!

***UPDATE
Got an email from dad that mom started getting a fever last night (Monday). It's not high (101F), and she's started on antibiotics, and they're doing tests to focus the treatment more on whatever's trying to make an inroad, but results won't be ready until later today (Tuesday). Hopefully mom keeps calm and keeps sleeping and eating. Will post more soon.

Shift in focus

Wow, I have no energy. I haven't done anything all day, so I'm not sure what's going on - hopefully this isn't me getting whatever stomach virus Kent had all week! I don't feel sick at all, just really tired. Mm.

Mom is still doing well with the treatment and has been taking her anti-anxiety meds and is sounding chipper, so I've been putting more attention back to the wedding planning. I feel behind, but apparently am not in too bad a position. Next Friday is going to be busy for decisions, since I'll be meeting with the caterer and the friend helping me with decor, and before then really need to pull some pictures so I can make those decisions quickly.

I finally got my shoes shipped on Tuesday and took my dress in for alterations, it's going to be close but at least the tailoring will be relatively easy (shortening the skirt and taking in a little extra fabric at the back), so hopefully that will work out well.

We still need to get the booze, and are seeing what we can do for video and I should check on lighting.

Ummmm, what else. I should consult my lists.

In the mean time, it's back to the magazines to pull pictures of things I like and to look for potential hairstyles! Less than 5 weeks to go...

We've been invited to an anti-Valentine's Day party tomorrow. More on that later! We don't have Valentine plans for this weekend - the original plan was to go to dinner somewhere, but since Kent was sick we've put that off. The place we're looking at should be less busy next weekend, anyway.

Welcome to mom updates

Hi there, new readers! I've been posting on mom's fight against leukemia here, and I'll be keeping a separate tag for those searching for those posts. If you want to read the whole blog and my full line of chitchat, come to Miss Interpretation. If you are only interested in reading about mom's updates, you can use this URL (and mark it as a favorite):
http://derende.blogspot.com/search/label/mom%27s%20health

UPDATE: I've also added a widget here so you can email the blog entries if you want to. See at the bottom of the post - look for the envelope.

I'll try to keep from mixing subjects too much in the entries. That makes for confusing reading, anyway.

So, it turns out that mom had a rough day yesterday. Her blood counts finally took a dive and she started feeling bad, and in conjunction with that started feeling really anxious. The staff were trying to get her to take a low-dose Valium to help, but she refused because she doesn't want to get addicted to Valium. I think she must have read "Valley of the Dolls" at an impressionable age. So, we're encouraging her to reconsider, since it may work better than the anti-anxiety medication she was getting. It's "mother's little helper" for a reason!

My main concern at the moment is getting her anxiety level down. It's burning up energy she needs for other things, and high anxiety and nausea will just keep building each other up. I heard she was better by last night and hope that she's doing even better today. Hopefully she'll get a hold of the priest she's been looking for, too, which should help more.

Hopefully they are also realizing that sending six people into the room to dump a lot of information on her at one time is exacerbating the situation. Stop that!

I'll be checking in with them later today to see how things are going. She has today and tomorrow-day left to go on chemo (should be done by the evening), and then she'll be in recovery. The next 5-8 days or so are going to be touchy due to her low immunity (and feeling low energy and probably sore), but she'll be closely monitored. 22 days until she goes home (estimated).

Keep the good thoughts coming!

Mom update and Living Wills

I've been in touch with mom and dad since coming home. Mom is doing surprisingly well with the chemo. In fact, it's turning out that she's far stronger than expected - her blood counts are not dropping as the doctor expected them to. In fact, a couple have gone up! I'm sure the doctor is consulting with other hematologists and oncologists, but from what I hear the chemo will still be wrapped up after the 7 days. She only has two days to go, then will be starting the recovery phase.

One of the things mom got at the hospital was a booklet called "Five Wishes" (wiki article here) (pdf here). All patients at the hospital get this, so it's not a function of the health problem or prognosis. It's essentially a living will, which outlines your healthcare wishes and selects healthcare power of attorney (it's legal in about 20 states if signed and witnessed correctly). Mom and Dad are working on them now, one for each of them, and are finding it upsetting.

Personally, I think everyone should have something like this done, just in case, regardless of age or health. I had to do this when I did my living trust in 2003 (the living will is part of the trust). It was upsetting to think about these things happening, especially the conditions under which I'd want to have them withhold life support, but I found that I felt better once I had everything I wanted in writing, so people didn't have to guess or worry about what to do if something happened to me.

I have to update my living trust this spring (another side effect of getting married, although there are items in there which need updating anyway), so I'll be reviewing my living will to see if I want to change anything. I'm also going to have Kent go through the Five Wishes so he can do his living trust.

If any of you would like mom's contact information to send a card or note or something (please note, flowers are not allowed), let me know and I'll get it to you. She definitely perks up when chatting on the phone or with visitors, too (although not many at a time), so if you're inclined, consider it! Dad is also going through a rough time, so giving him a call is good, too.

Everyone keep sending healing thoughts! I posted the list on her bulletin board of people I knew of who were sending mom thoughts and prayers and meditating for her - hopefully when she sees all the people pulling for her, it helps. I think the visualization of the chemo as little Rambos going after the cancer cells also helps - plus, it makes me smile to think of a molecule with itty bitty headband and machine gun, screaming and going after a hidden foxhole of blast cells.

Coming Back Out

OK, this time I have a really good reason for being out of sight for a while. We've been blindsided! I was on my way to meet with my caterer last week and got a call from mom and dad right before I went in. They sounded off-center, and it turns out that what they thought was a minor problem for mom had just been diagnosed as leukemia.

You want something to snap your other problems into proper perspective, that is one way.

So, the last week and a half has been a roller coaster, but not the good kind. I'm learning all kinds of things that I really would have been OK not knowing. If you're ever in the position of getting this kind of news, let me warn you that going onto Google at 10 pm to look up the condition is a TERRIBLE idea, especially if you're alone in the house. This was all before some follow up tests, so I've been having trouble not getting ahead of myself.

With the follow up tests, it turns out that mom is in just about the best possible position for leukemia - it's localized, with none in her marrow, blood, or spinal fluid samples. She's still going to be in the hospital for a month. This is due to the treatment plan, where she will get chemotherapy for seven days in a row, to knock out all her white blood cells (unfortunately the healthy ones are taken out in addition to the malignant ones). When they're gone, she'll be very susceptible to infections, so she'll be under observation and kept on a safer floor.

Mom started chemo yesterday - we got to the hospital at 8 am, checked in, got to her room, had her central line put in, a heart exam, and started chemo in the afternoon. The schedules kept getting moved around, which didn't help mom's feelings of anxiety and being overwhelmed, so we did our best to keep her engaged and not worrying about everything at once. I think she hit a real wall of "too much" when the nurse was showing us the chemotherapy schedule, since there were so many drugs on the list. She's been joking that she's going to walk out, but I hope that she keeps in mind that this is better than the alternative.

We were thrilled when she turned out to have essentially no side effects from the first round of chemo drugs. She is in better spirits today, even sounding cheerful, and we are trying to get more visitors to come by. She's worried about feeling sicker, but as long as we encourage her and make sure she's as protected as possible from infections and also encourage her to eat whatever she wants, I think she's in a great position to get through it really well. We'll have to also make sure that she doesn't try to be too much of a good patient - that she should let the staff know ASAP if she starts feeling uncomfortable in any way, so they can make any necessary corrections early.

Here's a new thing I learned: once your white blood cell count gets below a certain level, you have to follow the same food safety rules as you do when you travel (no raw foods except for fruit you can peel (banana, orange), foods need to be well cooked and kept hot, etc). Huh.

I'll be going back to SF on Monday, about the same time they're expecting mom to start feeling tired and flu-y. Hopefully I can help out enough before then that they can focus on mom's treatment and recovery. I can come back out in a couple of weeks if they want or need me.

Mom will be getting a haircut tomorrow. I should warn her in advance of hair trauma, but at least it will be easier when it's cut than if her shoulder length hair was coming out from the chemo.

We're doing all we can to make sure she's comfortable and upbeat. However, she finds a lot of help in knowing that people are pulling for her, thinking about her, and praying for her. If you have any messages you'd like to pass on to her, feel free to leave a comment and I'll pass the messages on.

27 days to go before she goes home!

The wedding is still going ahead as planned for now!

Big inhale, and....

BIG SIGH.

Lots of stuff still to do, and now I have a cold on top of it. We've made some progress in the wedding planning, but there is still a lot to do, and I'm kind of disheartened since I feel like I have so little help. None of my family is here, and I don't think I can impose on people to help - or, more importantly, I have had some people offer to help (and thank you, I really do appreciate it!) but I can't think of what they can help out with. The invitations are getting here on Monday, so I will be calling some bluffs and asking for some help assembling the invitations next weekend. The red wine will be held in a safe place until all light colored paper is off the table. I really should be working on labels today and prepping envelopes - there's a goal!

A lot of other stuff still hasn't gotten far. Flowers and decor? Later. Looking for inspirations, that's about it. Clothes? Still haven't found shoes. Ceremony ideas? Please. I do think we've fixed on a photographer. Still a lot to do.

Anyway, I shouldn't worry too much about it. It's not going to be a grand affair, but it will be a nice cocktail party, small and friendly. I should put more effort in today so I'm not too distracted at work this week.

Speaking of which, I should also try and catch up on some of the (lots of) work I've been distracted from, too. Yeah, not sure that's happening today.

However, I think there are some banana cookies in my near future. If I'm going to procrastinate, it might as well taste good.

Wait, that's not funny!

So I got an email from a friend today who's volunteered to help a friend with her wedding. The friend has only gotten a site and has talked to a caterer, and was asking for help because the wedding is in April and she still needs a baker, a photographer, a florist, DJ etc.

Did I mention the wedding is in APRIL?

I started to laugh at how crazy that was before I remembered that I've got a site and am talking to a caterer. I still need to work out florist, photographer.... and my wedding is in March.

Crap.

Word of advice to anyone engaged out there - NEVER EVER EVER EVER buy a house between the proposal and the wedding.

Puttering

This is more like it. I have been puttering around the house for the last day and a half, and have been getting things done that have been on the list for a while:

1. removed the upstairs showerhead to figure out what was blocking the spray (plastic bits - I soaked the mechanism in vinegar to clear out any lime deposits and it's all ready to install somewhere).
2. installed a low-flow showerhead upstairs - we'll see if we keep it there, or put it downstairs where we have a bit of a hydroblasting problem with the higher water pressure.
3. did several loads of laundry
4. cleaned and remade the guest room
5. made a big pot of black bean soup
6. dismantled and cleaned out a metal cabinet which still stank of molten plastic after the fluorescent ballast incident in October (the fixture is disconnected, but that smell lingered)
7. cleaned the kitchen
8. unpacked a bunch of bathroom stuff into a closable bookcase. We really need to add storage space when we work on that bathroom!

I've also managed to get some reading and napping in. Yum. I've also looked around online about more of the open wedding items - I guess that is next on the list. Back to work bright and early tomorrow! But first - I think I need to unpack more books.

FINALLY some pictures!

I know, but look, Burning Man was only four months ago!

I posted pics from Burning Man, Halloween, Kent's nephew's wedding in Washington, Christmas in Denver, and Liz and Grady's New Year's Eve big city wedding!

Enjoy...

Waiting for the keeping.

This was the first week back at work after two weeks off. All I can say is: yuck. I want to be kept sooner than later, so I can sleep in and do things like artwork. I have to admit I was not very productive this week, partially from the fresh-off-vacation thing, partially from several-days-of-parties-without-a-break, but also partially because I'm starting to panic about the wedding (it's only 10 weeks away! 10 WEEKS! we have so much to do!!), and am spending time looking things up and calling people to leave anxious messages.

I got proofs for the invitations this week, though (debating removing the lyrics since I didn't hear back from the group about their policy not to sue me if I use them), and got a second proposal from the caterer, and the second cake tasting. I need to call the caterer and arrange a tasting and see if there is any way we can save some money (I don't think we need to rent their cocktail tables - not 10, anyway), and the first baker since her samples were delicious and the second baker hasn't got back to us with a bid.

There is obviously still a lot to do. Photographer, alterations, accessories, stocking the bar, deciding what to do with the ceremony, selecting music - sheesh. I'm going to need another vacation when this is all over. No, not a honeymoon. That will come later when we have time to do a really good one - as of now it would just be one more thing to plan.

I had today off and had lots of plans to get things done (laundry, big grocery haul, walk-through at wedding site, layout, change showerhead in upstairs bathroom, make soup), and all I really got done was the walk-through. Kent was along, we stopped at the grocery store on the way home, but since we were on transit we had to keep it lighter. I may go back tomorrow to load up a bunch of staples, but we have food for the next few days at least. And tomorrow, I'll make the pot of black bean soup I'd meant to do today.

I also FINALLY downloaded a few hundred pictures from my camera, which have been stacking up for the last 5 months. I'm going through them and will have them on shutterfly soon. Some are already on facebook (you may want to check and see if any new ones are tagged with your name. Just sayin'. More where those came from).

Oh - last weekend really closed with a bang. The party on Saturday had an open bar and a karaoke machine. I finally did karaoke without choking! ("Hit Me With Your Best Shot") It was much easier at a party, facing the TV, with everyone in the room singing along. However, I wasn't paying attention, and Kent got to "karaoke drunk" (level 3) before I noticed. Fortunately we got down the stairs and home without incident, but he has been refusing a glass of wine since.

Sunday, we went and saw the new Cirque du Soleil "Ovo". Great show, highly recommended, although not if you've been out for the previous 5 days in a row, and need to go to work the next morning!

So - big plans again for tomorrow. We'll see if the follow through is any better!